You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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