Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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