god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
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Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
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My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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