Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
