this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize