I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
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He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
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i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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