Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
