If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
