Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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