What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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