I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
