so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
