I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
There r osticjed everywhere
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
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