Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
