I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
