I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize