Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
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kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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