thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
