Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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