Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
