If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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