Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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