Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
