What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
