Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
