Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
