My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
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We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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