Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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