bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize