I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
organizing the empties. That sober.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
