I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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