it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
