can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize