we have pet lesbian snakes
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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