Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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