Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
