Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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