I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You smell like stripper and shame
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
