Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
