I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
