Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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