does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
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I feel like everything in this room is sweating
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
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You are a booty call, not a friend.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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