I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize