You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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