like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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