Where did you get a picture of my penis
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
