We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
