umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
