THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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