I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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