There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
dude. I can hear the air.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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